How to Tell Your Partner About Your Sexual Fantasies

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At first, the idea of telling your partner about your sexual fantasies might feel quite embarrassing, especially if you tend to overthink everything and therefore start worrying that they might laugh at you. Such thoughts can be quite discouraging or scary, but the truth is that there’s no need to worry – these days, sex isn’t considered taboo anymore, and talking about your fantasies is no big deal.

That’s why if you’re starting to feel like it’s time to open up and reveal your sexual fantasies to your partner, you can go about it by making sure that you know why it’s so important to you. Next, you can make an effort to pick the right time and place to do so and try to decide what exactly you want to say. Read the article below for a few tips that should make this challenge a lot easier for both you and your partner.

Be Careful With the Words You Choose

First of all, when you’re about to share your sexual fantasies with your partner, you need to make sure that you choose the right words. In general, it's better if you avoid using terms like “weird” or “bizarre” out of embarrassment and instead pick words that should be more encouraging and comforting and make you feel confident about what you’re trying to express.

For example, you could start by saying, "I know that this would be difficult for most people, so I’m not expecting you to say yes right away. However, I want to feel free to tell you what I’d like sexually, so I hope you can hear me out and let me know what you think.” Whether you want to talk about sex toys such as foot fleshlight or discuss trying roleplay in bed, it’s essential that you listen to your partner and don’t require them to say “yes” to your every idea.

Pick a Good Time and Place

The next thing to do would be to pick a good time and place. It’s essential that you choose a time when both of you should feel relaxed and comfortable, and a place where you won’t be interrupted. That’s why it’s best if you decide to talk about your fantasies when you’re at home and have plenty of time for a long conversation – for example, when you’re cuddling in bed or watching a movie together on the couch.

Even if you’re starting to feel a bit impatient and can’t wait to start the conversation, it’s important that you’re not trying to discuss such an important matter when your partner is busy with work or preoccupied with doing something else.

Tell Your Partner What Excites You

When it comes to the importance of communication in a relationship, telling your partner about your sexual fantasies is definitely one of the most crucial things. After all, this way, they will be able to understand what turns you on and what kind of stimulation works for you the most.

That being said, when talking about this topic with your partner, make sure that you go into details. Instead of saying, “I would like to try role play,” try to specify what kind of role play you’re exactly interested in or what scenarios you like imagining. When talking about trying rougher sex, make sure to ask your partner what they would be comfortable with. For instance, they might feel fine about spanking but draw the line at choking out of safety concerns.

Be Patient and Understanding

When talking about the fantasies you have, it would be best if you try to listen attentively and really pay attention to what your partner has to say – that way, you can give them all the time they need and respect their boundaries. Furthermore, asking them questions might help them feel more comfortable talking about their fantasies with you; thus, they will get to see how interested you are in them and how much you care about their needs.

Keep in mind that even though telling your partner about your sexual fantasies is an important step in a relationship, it doesn’t mean that everything will change overnight. Therefore, be patient with the whole process and don’t expect your partner to jump right into fulfilling your fantasies.

In Conclusion

There are many reasons why people tend to hide their sexual desires from their partners or play it safe by sticking with vanilla sex only. However, hiding your inner desires is never easy or rewarding in the long run.

That’s why if it seems like it’s finally time for you to share your deepest fantasies with your partner and give both of you an opportunity for some fun times together, make sure that you follow these tips first – using these strategies should make this challenge a lot easier for both of you!