Synastry Red Flags: Why They Aren’t Your “Twin Flame”

Hey. Do you fall somewhere on the LGBTQ2S+ spectrum? Are you into astrology? Are you wondering if that new person you have your eye on, or your ex-partner, or the person your ex used to date but now you want to date is The One?

Then keep on reading, friend, because you and I are kindred spirits and I would wish to save you some pain - or at the very least, give you some insight into how to best navigate the queer dating world... using synastry charts as your handy little guide.

As astrology and chart-casting continues to grow in popularity (particularly with the Pluto in Scorpio and Pluto in Sagittarius generations), we can see a marked upward trend in its usage in the queer community. Whether this is due to our cultural heritage of embracing fringe practices or ideas, or because we have a tendency to invest in and become absorbed by any tool of self-awareness and compatibility (see also: Myers-Briggs, Jung, Life Path Numbers and numerology, Tarot, etc), we know that our community is accessing and utilizing astrology at a (forgive me) astronomical rate. With competent knowledge of synastry - what is essentially just relationship astrology - we are able to identify potential positive and negative patterns that may come up when two people meet.

In Sysnastry Astrology we take the natal charts of two people and lay one on top of the other. We look at how the planets of one fit with the planets and houses of the other, and then vice versa. You’ll need your tow natal charts to do this - we recommend using the calculators on Astro.com.

Before I dive in with what I can only call my No-Nuance November take, I want to make it clear to those reading that no one aspect can define the strength of a relationship; synastry charts need to be read in their entirety and with consideration to the whole of each person. With that said, there are a few aspects that are trickier to navigate than others and can lend themselves to a relationship that may be more work than it is worth. If you find yourself in a position of experiencing more pain than peace with a person, be this romantic partner or friend, having even just base knowledge of ‘red flag’ aspects in synastry can be helpful to further weigh that out (Part 1 of ?):

PLUTO SQUARE / CONJUNCT ASCENDANT.

In this aspect, we see a common theme of the Pluto person attempting to control the Ascendant person. Whether this is expressed consciously or unconsciously, if the Ascendant person in their entirety are more domicile than the Pluto person, this can create a largely unbalanced power dynamic between the two and potentially lead to an abuse of that power, typically on the physical plane as the Ascendant rules over the body and outward expression. The Pluto person’s natural intensity will be quite powerful and possibly overwhelming for the Ascendant person, which can absolutely be a seductive and otherworldly experience on their part but can, as well, allow the Ascendant person to fall victim to more unhealthy complexes.

NEPTUNE SQUARE / OPPOSITE SUN.

The Neptune person may be something of an intriguing mystery to the Sun person, attracting the Sun person like a moth to flame for what may be hidden underneath the surface. With this aspect, the Neptune person can be intentionally leading the Sun person on to be something that they are not in order to appeal to or manipulate the Sun person, or it can be as simple as the Neptune person being of a more mutable nature, i.e., hard to pin down, lacking in ability to commit, or simply just the escapist type.

This aspect is challenging largely because the Sun person is unable to see the Neptune person clearly: this red flag is quite literally the embodiment of the expression, “When you wear rose-coloured glasses, red flags just look like flags.”

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Rylen Moore, Astrologer
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Synastry Red Flags Part I - Rylen Moore
Synastry Red Flags Part II - Rylen Moore

Rylen Moore is a queer freelance writer, LGBTQ+ advocate, and Child & Youth Care graduate. An Albertan-turned-Vancouverite, they use their astrological studies as a framework to better understand and work with at-risk youth as well as run their own chart-reading business. You can find them on Facebook for Moon horoscopes, weekly astrological content, and personal services @ It's Just A Phase (facebook.com/readingsbyrylen) .

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